Tag Archives: Lifestyle

A Calmer You: Kisi ke paas charger hai?

I know what some Einsteins among you must be thinking right now. Cell phone toh likha nahi, charger likh diya. Hai nah? Bolo, bolo. Look at my photo above. Bewakoof lagti hoon? Some things in life are understood yaar. Phone toh hai hi by default, but tell me, hand on heart, how many of you get stressed about how much charge your cellphone battery has or doesn’t, several times during the day. So many nah? That’s why a charger has rightfully made it to the list of our basic needs. And when there is need, there is also stress if it doesn’t get met.

A Calmer You Kisi ke paas charger hai

 Aur charger na hone ka stress toh khatarnaak hai. The same desperation and frequency with which you hear shout-outs in the college or office saying, ‘So who’s coming to the loo?’ can be now sensed when you hear ‘kisi ke paas iPhone ka charger hai?’. Earlier the good’ol traffic signal vendors would sell the humble cotton candy, now they sell phone chargers of all sizes. Vaise this size bit reminds me, what an unfair thing by the telecom ­companies that they can spend ­millions on launching newer, sleeker phone models but can’t come up with the option of using the same charger on every make, every model of a cell phone.

This half-eaten Apple wala company is the worst tease. They changed the charger slot itself when they moved from iPhone4 to iPhone5. Such an ­encouragement for the ­show-offs… where you’d earlier say, ‘does anyone have an iPhone charger’, now you have to declare in a shamelessly capitalistic way that you need a ‘chhota pin wala iPhone 5 charger’. Imagine the extent to which universal ­brotherhood would have got a boost if, along with caste, creed and colour, we all could shed our Nokia, Samsung, Blackberry, iPhone, Micromax biases and use the same charger for phones whether they cost 2K or 50K.

I think I’m the only one who is thinking of patriotism at this high level on Republic Day, no? Aap log toh baithe hoge rajai mein, with five different phones in the family, plugged with five different kind of chargers on the switch board. Sigh. Anyway, this whole charger obsession also made me observe a few varied…and weird kinds of behaviour some people display when it comes to feeding their phone ­batteries. Let’s analyse these breeds…

The charge hunters: For these people, the biggest quest doesn’t relate to finding the true meaning of life, it begins and ends at finding a point to plug in their phone charger. They’ll check into a hotel for a vacation, and before keeping the luggage down, would hunt down the charging point and plug in their phone. All the souls ­wandering around an airport lounge, looking highly confused and lost, are also the ones not looking for their boarding gate, but for a phone charging point. Whether in the office of the ­college canteen, or in their fancy cars, their phone would be plugged to the wall, much like a leashed and tied dog, and I’m sure, cursing its owner in ­telecom language. These people are so obsessed that their phone battery should be fully charged all the time, that the besharam of the lot would not even think twice before removing someone else’s phone getting charged and plugging in their own. The ­identifying traits of this breed – 100% phone battery… and high blood pressure.

The charge-less: This is the other end of the rainbow. These people do not wake up to the hunger pangs and cries of their phone battery till the charge reaches 1%, or passes away. Their friends and family are by now are used to listening to the ‘The number you are ­trying to reach has been switched off’ message in the beautiful voice of Airtel or Vodafone ­aunties. Their wives and girlfriends and bosses shout at them everyday, but somehow they can’t remember to carry the phone charger. Identifying traits – 0% phone battery… and high blood pressure.

The charge savers: Yeh intelligent log hainPadhe likhe…with too much time at hand to read up on the various ways you can save your phone battery. They’ll be too happy to give you tips on how to increase ­battery life. If they are close to you, they might just snatch your phone and switch off some background applications so that your battery gets more life. They are the same people who are always ready with ­naturopathy cures for all your diseases and tell you to eat healthy and exercise everyday. They are also savvy enough to save their hard earned money in buying phone covers that come in-built with extra batteries, and portable battery backups. Identifying traits – two batteries for every phone… 0% blood ­pressure problems.

The charge ­borrowers: Shameless morons who are either too ­kanjoos to buy their own ­chargers or too forgetful to bring them from home. So they are always seen begging for a ­charger. Banks should come up for easy ­instalment schemes for this breed. I also proudly sit in this category and my work day begins with bowing my head down before a Ganpati idol in my office, followed by a ‘kisi ke paas charger hai?’ query. During appraisal times, my query is ­­­met with a prompt and willing response by my team, but in other months, I can hear them mutter ‘Apna kyun nahi laati?’ under their breath. Samarth, the music editor in my team curses the day he and I ended up buying the same phone models… now he hands over the charger as soon as I reach, without me even ­asking for it. AND cries helplessly when I sometimes even take it home with me. Identifying traits: Blood pressure problems – Borrower 0%, lender 100%!

So which breed are you? Dekho whatever it is, some stress about charger stays… right? Join me in this cause to promote national integration and harmony by demanding a universal phone charger. Modi or Rahul or Kejriwal or anyone else – whoever makes it their first manifesto promise is getting my vote. Yours?

Sonal Kalra just cleaned up her drawers and found 7 phone ­chargers. None of it works with her current cell phone. Is Red Cross interested in a donation?

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All good things in life are for free?

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Life- undoubtedly the most beautiful and the most precious gift one could ever get. The unfathomable bliss in listening to the chirping birds, in feeling the warmth of the balmy spring; to give and to get love, to smile and to laugh. Yes, this was only what life was supposed to be about. It was supposed to be about working hard, utilizing all the bountiful blessings of the Almighty and Nature, and rejoicing. However, since Adam and Eve did their sin and descended to the Earth as a penalty, we being their descendants have to bear the brunt. As such, life today is not only about smiles and laughter, but also about sobs and sniffles which we ourselves and allowed to dominate over us.

life-and-living

In the present scenario, life is not about ‘living’ happily, but about managing, anyhow, to earn a handsome ‘living’. We are at a phase where people have started treating this very ‘living’ as a permission to enjoy living their own lives. Consequently, we see people engrossed in a rat race, foregoing, or rather losing all that they have. No wonder we see estranged families, envious colleagues and selfishness all around. We see people drowning in the quagmire of melancholy because they couldn’t make it to the top and we see people flying in the airs of arrogance because they managed to make it to the top. These very causes are perhaps the major reasons as to why we started being pessimistic about life and its ways, as to why we started being cynical enough to compare life with an insurmountable problem. What we don’t realize is that life is not about getting but about giving. Nobody can in any way stop us from sustaining in the society but we ourselves.

All good things in life are for free

It doesn’t matter how much living we make, for as rightly said, “All good things in life are for free”. What would be the living of a person who is at a higher post than yours? Perhaps a few thousands more? Does this fact ever make his family love him more and your family love you less? Or does nature become more bountiful to him and less to you after getting to know your wages? No. The status of his rank only and only defines how much living he makes, not the way he lives his life.

The living you make never describes the character you have or the person you are. You might be a lower class fellow, or even a middle class one for that matter, and still earn loads of love, respect and plenty of compassionate helping hands if you are good to others. On the contrary, you might be the Boss of a big company, earning a very handsome salary. But will the salary ever earn true love, respect and compassion for you? People might even hate you if you aren’t’t good to them. This way, you will rather end up earning more hatred and curses, more plotters and haters. Consequently, you will have a very uneasy and treacherous life, full of loneliness, fear and insecurity. Better to say, you will have no life at all.

We have been blessed by God in order that we may bless the lives of others. The wealth accumulated over the years will have no meaning or use once you depart from this world. On the other hand, the love, support you gave to people will always be in their hearts. Beautiful acts of spontaneous generosity will give you that unfathomable and inexpressive inner happiness which is hard to find in the modern day.

As rightly said, what we give to others is what we get. If we do our bit to make other’s lives better, they will do their bit in making our lives better. If we give love and respect to others and help them in their need, we will get love and help from others in our need. Herein we see that by giving life to others, we give life to ourselves, the life as it was supposed to be-full of compassion and smiles. The living we get has nothing to do with the lives we make and this is aptly summed up when we say, “We make a living by what we get, we make life by what we give.”

A Calmer You – here’s a resolution: let us gossip

The secret formula for a stress-free, long life is now revealed.

In January 2011, I had written a column about making a resolution that I shall not indulge in gossip. In January 2014, I want to slap myself for it. Nasht ho gayi zindagi in teen saal mein, saara mazaa hi chala gaya lifese. Of course, aspiring to have good values was the intent, but I never bargained for turning into Alok Nath! And on top of this self-invited boredom, I also compromised on my longevity, you see. Because as a recent study by the University of Michigan says in its report — which by the way I have framed and light agarbattis before, every morning — people, especially women, who gossip, live longer. Gossiping apparently elevates levels of progesterone; a hormone that reduces stress and makes you feels good.

Kya baat hai, University of Michigan, pehli baar koi interesting teer maara hai. Now, you see, whether I like it or not, I would have to gossip in the interest of science and research.  And humanity. And divinity.  And while on this trip, my mind has figured out some valid benefits of gossiping. But woh batane se pehle let me break my fast and tell you what I overheard coming from Chaddha ji’s house this morning. His daughter Bansuri was playing, I mean wailing. Not that it’s new, she’s been crying about pretty much everything ever since she turned a teenager. But she was crying out rather loud, so purely out of concern and sympathy (ha,ha), I went out to the balcony and heard this…

Bansuri: Daddy jiii, yeh dress poori nahi aa rahiA Calmer You - here’s a resolution let us gossip
Chadda ji: Dress toh wahi hai,  tum poori nahi aa rahi hogi
Bansuri: Mummy jiii, daddy ji mazaak udaa rahe hain
Mrs Chaddha: Inse kaho pehle apne shaadi waale suit mein poore aa ke dikhaayein
Chaddha ji: Us manhoos suit ko toh meine 10saal pehle lohri mein jalaa diya thaa
Mrs Chaddha: #$%^&**Y%#@

Phew! Thank God I could tell someone all this. If you have neighbours like the Chaddhas, AND you have the permission from University of Michigan to gossip, why would stress anyway come near you. Haan? So here’s why I think that research would have allowed us this oldest pleasure known to mankind…

1 Law of diminishing hatred:  You see, the moment you gossip about someone, pangs of guilt overtake your mind. I’m not referring to the typical readers of this column, but this happens at least with most normal, good people.

That guilt suddenly makes you want to be all nice to the victim of your gossip. So without that person even knowing the reason for it, you go out of your way to be good to him/her. Dekha? The devi of gossip actually enhances goodness and bonding between people. Jai ho.

2 It is social work, in disguise: Gossiping about someone else’s bad behaviour is simply your way of warning everyone else about it. Toh aap toh charity kar rahe ho. Isn’t that supposed to be a noble thing? The other day two girls at work were gossiping about the behaviour of the office  Casanova. Since I was Alok Nath at that time, I immediately went up to lecture them about the sanskaar of not gossiping, but before I could say something, a third girl who was overhearing them, also joined in and they realised that Mr Casanova had used the same pick up line on all three, pretending to be only interested in them. Bas! Girls safe and happy, Alok Nath ji chup.

3 Six degrees of separation: Whether you like it or not, gossiping is perhaps the best way to discover people who are exactly like you. Lifelong rishtey ban jaate hain ji, over gossip sessions. We all outwardly take a stand that we hate gossip mongers, but deep inside we know the thrill of being able to high-five a person whose mean-ness levels are exactly the same as ours. A person at work who is my gossip partner would know exactly what I mean. And you know what, people who gossip also have to be creative. Because you can’t excel at gossiping unless it’s told in an entertaining way. Mehnat lagti hai, talent bhi lagta hai, koi mazaak hai? Denouncing an activity that stimulates the mind at so many different levels is sacrilege.

Ab thoda serious ho jayein, just for a minute? See, I wrote all of this in good faith towards your sensibilities and intelligence. I hope you know the difference between malicious backbiting and relatively harmless, idle chatter. It’s easy to act Puritans and deny it, but I can bet my AAP jhaadu that there’s not even a single person who hasn’t done the latter, at some or the other time. I’m only asking for an admission of the truth here, as long as we are aware of our boundaries.

Spreading false rumours about someone with an intent to harm his or her reputation is not gossip, it is sin. The thumb rule that I apply to myself is simple.

I imagine a situation where the person I’m gossiping about, turns out to be standing behind me when I’m speaking. If I can still say the same thing about them playfully to their face, I’m doing okay. Don’t ever say anything behind a person’s back, that, if the need or situation be, you can’t repeat in front of them. And, finally, to the victims of harmful gossip. Dekho yaar, there’ll always be people in life who would love to see you fail, simply because they didn’t succeed. They’ll keep talking behind your back, but you’ve got to realise that they are ‘behind’ you for a reason.

Here’s a random, confusing, but golden advice, a la Chaddha ji — ‘Agar aap hi har waqt yeh sochenge ki log kya sochenge, toh phir log kya sochenge?’

Sonal Kalra is wondering if all the sweetness and goodness in trying to be Alok Nath, gave her diabetes. How will she handle a very long life now?

Blurring indentity in the race of impressing others

Think for a while when was the last time you did something that you actually love , what you actually are. Next time you do something that is not you think aren’t you leading a fake life ? whether it is about listening Hollywood songs just to become cool among friends,whether it is about branded clothes ,or whether you apply lots of make up then excuse me miss. Make up can make you look beautiful from outside ,not from inside unless you eat makeup.

life-is-full-off-fake-people

One of my friend told me don’t laugh so hard u look ugly I told her is there a better brand of laughter so that I could buy .Who the hell is other person to judge you.

I’ll have to join twitter , Whatsapp , hike too to make an impression otherwise ill be called as backward : one year back when I had gone to attend my Fresher party one of my friend asked me are you on Facebook , I said no I don’t like being on Facebook. He told why aren’t you ? even kids use Facebook .If you are also a victim of such remarks then ask them how many good books have you read till date ? or how many curricular activities you have adopted till now ,or how many times have you genuinely talked to your relatives who have come to your place instead searching for notifications ,tags and superficial comments on your photographs which surely u had taken from Instagram.

oh now my English will decide what are my qualifications: language is just a way to communicate and surely my English will not decide what I m . Kudos to all those who love talking in Hindi and are much more informed ,confident and Expressive. So next time if someone starts a trial of his/her English vocabulary in your friend circle do not hesitate to ask them to talk in Hindi . Do what you love not what impresses others.

Listening to English songs will not prove that you have better taste in music:one my friends asked me what kind of music do you listen ,I told them I love listening to Kishore Kumar songs , Lata Mangeshkar songs , he burst out of laughter . He told me who listens to Hindi songs . Next time someone points out on your choice of music on the basis of language ask them are you asking me about my music taste or whether my English vocabulary.

Lead your life not impress people but to find yourself ,what actually you are and mind it don’t allow your clothes , language , footwear , makeup ,music choice etc define you .Be precious instead of being special because those who actually love you will love you in any form.

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LIFE- Explained

We all are living in a world of illusion. Whenever you feel one with the world, realty slaps you hard on your face and forcibly makes you realize where u actually stands in this so called real world. You feel crushed from inside trying to deal with unbearable pain.

What We Think of Life?

Actually, the biggest irony of life is that you don’t get what you deserve; instead you get all that shit for which you have been pleading to God with a bleeding heart not to take place in your life. LIFE- An illusion you will live for all the years to come.

What Actually HAPPENS in LIfe?

There are times when you are unable to figure out what actually is running in your mind. At the same time when people around you behave vaguely putting you in a more hazy state of mind, is the time when you should leave everything in God’s hands expecting a brighter sun which will show you who are yours or who just have knocked at your doors to made you learn something you have never wished for otherwise.

Though these are times when your heart cries for more clarity & more true people around you who loves you for what you are rather than taking you as an option when they have nothing in their hands, but at the end of the day you learn something new which in return makes you wiser than before.

life-explained-by-rupali

The only thing we can do while fighting with such blurry & lonely times is to wish for it to pass away as soon as possible and wish for the sun of life or time shine more brilliantly to show us the path to what our heart wants and the blessings coming our way.

[stextbox id=”black”]“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.” 
―    Robert Frost[/stextbox]

What should we DO?

Most of us think that loneliness hurts a lot but it is not painful as painful as people taking you as an option in their lives. You only come in the picture when they have their own interests involved. When we are alone, there is no one to crush our emotions under their feet.

It is better to let go such people from your life. Don’t try to hold on to them. Though it’s not easy but by letting them go we create space for people who love us for who we are and respect our feelings too

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A Calmer You: You’re missing the picture, dude

Are you too busy clicking or tweeting to enjoy the real thing? This world is full of one category of people. Experts. Everyone has some advice to give to others, ekdum free. That’s why I say it’s important that you become an expert in sifting out the meaningful advice from routine gyan that floats around. Anyhow, I’m not any less in trying to be a self-styled expert, so I gave some unsolicited advice to a guy last week. He didn’t like it.

A Calmer You -You are missing the picture dude
Well, that’s his problem but I want you all to tell me if I was wrong in what I said. Hua yeh ke I went to a friend’s place and met his cousin who had just returned from a vacation in Singapore. He was excitedly telling her about his visit to Sentosa islands, which is famous, among other things, for being among the top places in the world to watch the most beautiful sunset. And then he started showing us photos that he’d clicked, of the sun setting behind the sea. Beautiful photos indeed….and five hundred and seventy two in number.
‘How long did the sunset last?’ I asked him. ‘A few minutes,’ he replied and added, ‘after that you can’t really see much because it starts to get dark.’ ‘So, are you going to go back to Singapore to watch the sunset, because you missed it?’, I asked. ‘Huh, I just came back after watching it,’ he replied. ‘No you didn’t, your camera did. When are YOU going to watch it?’ I asked, and he got offended. What followed was a long debate over how photos are also important for memories etc but my point, my friend, is simple. What fun are second hand memories when you’ve got so busy in creating them that you missed the real thing? A similar sentiment was echoed by my colleague Damini, who recently went to Turkey and attended the famous night opera in a picturesque, old Roman amphitheatre, with full moon in the backdrop. ‘All I kept trying was to click the perfect photo, and before I knew it, the opera was over,’ she said.

A lot of us, me included, similarly make the mistake of getting too busy tweeting when we see something exciting. When India played Sri Lanka in the cricket World Cup final in April, excitement ran high and I was tweeting like mad at every ball. After a while, I was trending on Twitter lists in Delhi, Mumbai, Bangalore but you know what, I missed out on most exciting moments of the match. Because I got too busy in thinking about the perfect and funniest tweet to post. Kya yaar. Technology was supposed to serve us. We didn’t even notice when we became its slaves, and started clicking and tweeting our life away on gadgets. I’ve decided to, henceforth, set these three rules for myself, to claim my life back.

If you see sense in it, take the advice.

1. Stop looking at life as ‘moments to capture for Facebook’: It’s cool that some nerd invented these media that make it so easy to share our fun moments with friends. But surely not at the cost of taking the whole fun out of them, no? I’ve seen young parents, who attend the school function of their kids, rush closer to the stage with mobile phones or video cameras as soon as their child’s performance begins. All these dads and moms must remember that watching their child’s entire performance through the lens is only as good as watching a TV programme, not a live act. Why not let your eyes and heart remember the moment?

2. Set a limit for how many photos you’ll take and STOP at that: I have nothing against taking beautiful pictures that form cherished memories, but the next time I go for a vacation and see something spectacular, I’ll take twenty photos and no more. With conventional cameras, we at least used to stop when the filmroll got over. Thanks to digicams and mobile phones (technology again!!), we just don’t know where to stop. Tell me honestly, how many times have you actually seen all the ten thousand photos you took of the cow on the village road in Rajasthan with senti tears in your eye? Bas karo. Tourism is not a punishment and its not as if you have to submit a homework album with every damn thing you spotted. Leave the camera in the hotel sometime and go for a walk. DO that.

3. Finally, I’ve decided to set an hour of ‘unplugged time’ for myself everyday: I will not touch any electronic gadget in that one hour. And I’ll still go out and try to see something beautiful, without the tension of capturing it or worrying about missing a call. Don’t you now try to give me the ‘phone is for our safety’ argument. Human beings used to go out of homes even when mobile phones were not invented…and came back alive. And puhleez, I love twitter and facebook too but don’t tweet every waking moment of your life away. Because it’ll somewhere take your mind away from what’s actually happening. I remember a joke I read somewhere about a girl whose friend asks her what her first kiss was like. She hesitates for a while, and then says, ‘Hold on, let me check. I must have tweeted about it.’ Had ho gayi yaar.

Sonal Kalra has decided to grab every moment life has to offer. And that can’t happen till both her hands are busy holding the phone.